Posts Tagged "Mayllennial"

Someone's still waiting for the sound, a status update, a sign

These sub sandwiches defied any real efforts at classification and consumption. They were an assortment of wet meat and mayo layered on an 8" bun that was about as Italian as a Pizza Pocket. They also had cheese. Or, perhaps more accurately, "cheeze."

I am a banana, but I am also le tired.

I'm shivering outside a Best Buy at 10am, masked up and waiting for it to open. It's April 2020. I don't know shit about anything anymore.

The Furby is iconic, creepy, and perfect for guarding a cursed portal. Buy yours today!(?)

"We had anticipated a modest installation to fullfill the city's Arts and Culture requirement for building developers. It appears, however, that you have spent several times the allotted budget to 'enhance' the Gargoyles, including custom Carrara marble plinths and bespoke laser light show."

The phone is Y2K Grey, the glittering dolphin-skinned shade favoured for consumer electronics of the era.

Today is the last time you will drink an Orbitz soda.

More and more often I find myself cross-referencing my 6 streaming accounts to find something to watch and turn up nothing. What if we brought back the Blockbuster experience instead?

Convened the fifth day of August, 1995, noontide, Yoshi's Island. Discussion: The Matter of the Screaming Bundle

You want to learn about economics? Stare into the button-eyed soul of the Beanie Babies and you'll see the spirit of the Dutch tulip bubble reborn in polyester plush.

I feel about 900 years old explaining how to play Pogs. Like pretty much every fad, it sounds ridiculous when you spell it out, but Pogs swept through the playground like prairie wildfire, slammers rolling through swingsets like flaming tumbleweeds.

We were not wired to endure the constant, random stimulus of learning about a nation's debt crisis, tips for manifesting destiny, and weird tricks to clean ketchup out of car seats. But here we are.

When painting your house Dusty Rose was chic.

A letter to a person or entity unlikely to respond.

The Wonder of the Galaxy from the Comfort of Home!

"If you have to worry about what guitar you need, that's emo. If you don't give a f*ck, then it's punk."

The appearance of the Wishbone Classics adaptation of "Romeo and Juliet" in my school library was a watershed moment.

Warding off a VHS revival in advance.

I made you a playlist